Friday, March 28, 2008

Daily Om: Letting Go


I actually sought out this Daily Om today; I needed some inspiration regarding letting go, detachment. It's interesting that the original article was written 2 years ago almost to the day!

I've been in a quiet place the past couple of days, reflecting on some relationships in my life that are changing, some by my own decision and others against my wishes. I don't do well with change and yet it keeps on happening, doesn't it? Nothing stays the same, including friendship I guess.

One of my oldest friends is going through some tough times and is withdrawing into herself, something she does when she is overwhelmed and dealing with big stuff in life. I respect that and just let her know that I'll be waiting when she is ready to poke her head out of the cave.

One of my newest friends has asked for some "space," various reasons and though I was stung and surprised, I'm trying to be respectful of that as well.

And then there is a relationship with some extended family members that I am choosing to detach from. Not cut off, not sever, just pull back a bit. I've tried and tried to connect, grow closer and have been met with indifference. I've been hurt and disappointed and need to lick my wounds for a while.

I'm a bit confused by all of this, not sure why this is happening. It's hard for me to let go of relationships, even when I know inately that it's for the best, that it's necessary to grow and be happier. I'm a Leo, after all, and am known for loving/caring deeply and intensely, sometimes to my own demise. But I must do this, have to start protecting my heart just a little bit more, might need to learn detachment and perhaps even grow some thicker skin so that I don't find myself beaten and bruised quite so often. We'll see how that goes.

March 30, 2005
Being Truly Free
Letting Go

There is tremendous freedom in letting go. It is liberation to free ourselves of things that clutter our lives; too many possessions, useless emotions, unhealthy habits, old beliefs, even people that drain our energy. All of these things and more can weigh us down. Every once in awhile it's good to "clean out our closets" literally and figuratively.

Like pruning dead branches or like a snake shedding an old skin, we need to let go of the what no longer serves or what no longer fits, so that there is room for something new, alive, and what is needed at this time in our lives. Yet, we are a possessive society. We often hold on to things, feelings, and relationships out of habit or, many times, out of fear of being without. For so much of learning to let go is about learning to trust. We have to be able to trust that, indeed, new branches will grow, that there is a new skin under the old one. And yet, to the degree that we are willing to let go, we are able to receive. When we stop holding on and clinging to anything, we realize we have everything.

For in reality, we really own nothing. Certainly, we don't own people. Our spouse, boyfriend, girlfriend, children are not really "ours." Even if we own the title to our house or car, such possessions can be gone in a moment, taken by a natural disaster, an accident, or financial circumstances. Native Americans could not grasp the European concept of "owning" land, anymore than one can own the sky. For everything belongs to the universe, as even we do. When we allow ourselves to rethink our sense of "ownership," it is easier to let go. We no longer need to feel burdened by the responsibility of having to hold on to something. Rethink the value of a prized book collection, a coveted job, and feelings for an old flame. Perhaps it isn't necessary to physically get rid of something, but letting go of the power that a person, ideology, or material object possesses is truly freeing.

6 comments:

~*SilverNeurotic*~ said...

You know, I am one of those people who often detaches from friends and family. It's truly nothing personal-I honestly need that space from time to time, especially when I'm not feeling my best. Try not to take it too badly with the new friend. She might be in that same position.

Mother of Invention said...

It is hard to let go if you form attachments easily as I do, but even I have reached the point where you realize that if the person/people don't appreciate or reciprocate time and time again,they are not worthy of your friendship efforts and it's not worth the energy you expend trying to keep connected.

Julie said...

Ugghhh! Something unssettling stirs inside of me..hard to describe - just a restless feeling with a tiny bit of fear. By the time I verbalize it - I almost always say, "The winds of change are coming. I can feel it."

I have never been wrong. I see change as a challenge and a chance not to get sedentary ...but that does not mean it is easy...especially when other people are involved.

Julie said...

Ugghhh! Something unssettling stirs inside of me..hard to describe - just a restless feeling with a tiny bit of fear. By the time I verbalize it - I almost always say, "The winds of change are coming. I can feel it."

I have never been wrong. I see change as a challenge and a chance not to get sedentary ...but that does not mean it is easy...especially when other people are involved.

kim said...

Sometimes, detaching ourselves is what saves us most. That and forgiving, I think.

Like Mother of Invention has said, I too form attachments easily and quickly, unusual for a Scorpio. It can leave you open to hurt.

Aisling said...

It's been quite a few days since you posted. I hope you are doing alright! I'm thinking of you!