Sunday, August 22, 2010

Bittersweet

bit·ter·sweet (btr-swt)
n.

1. Bitter and sweet at the same time: bittersweet chocolate.
2. Producing or expressing a mixture of pain and pleasure: a movie with a bittersweet ending.


It's a bittersweet time here at the Castle, emotions are all over the map. You see, my littlest bird, my Bambi, has decided to go away for college. A natural, normal event, of course, but one I'm not quite ready for. (Is any mother ever ready for her babies to leave the nest?) She made the decision a few months ago and though I am so proud of her courage and independence, I admit there was a part of me who held onto the hope that she would change her mind. No, not my Bambi, once she makes a decision she sticks with it. She has a goal and she's going to meet it, come hell or high water.

So yesterday our family made the trip to the big ol' college town of her choice, unloaded B's possessions and proceeded to set her up in a little apartment.





Beren and I got her all settled in and then took she and her friends out to lunch...




made a run to the grocery store because there's no way I could leave her with an empty fridge! Then I reluctantly said goodbye, doing my best not to break down sobbing, and made the 2 hour drive back to our Ormond house. Kali & Lindsey stayed with her overnight, as did her boyfriend, so she won't be really alone until tonight.
I know there will be some homesick moments, days when she's tempted to pack up her kitten and head south, but I think she'll resist. She'll be ok..she really will..me? Well, that might be another story. I am dreading returning home to find her empty room, devoid of her pictures, momentos..the very essence of Bambi. I hope I can be as strong as she is.

In the meantime, my other kids will be stopping here for dinner before heading home, so I'll put my energies into the kitchen as I always due when feeling blue. A simply pasta dinner is in order, my Mom's Brownie Chip Cookies for dessert. These are the cookies mom has made over the years for every family occasion, happy and sad, we could always count on these delicious goodies being part of it. I'd like to think Mom's with me today, nodding with understanding and surrounding me with warm comforting hugs.



SAM'S BROWNIE CHIP COOKIES

1 box brownie mix
1 c. chocolate chips
2 eggs
1/4 c. oil

Preheat oven to 350 degrees. Grease cookie sheets. Combine mix, eggs,, and oil in large bowl. Beat about 50 strokes by hand. Stir in chips. Drop by rounded teaspoon on baking sheets. Bake 8 to 10 minutes. Cookies are soft to touch. Cool slightly before removing from baking sheet.

Note: these are not the prettiest cookies in the world..grin..but I promise you after one bite you won't care!


Blessings,

4 comments:

Karla said...

This time next year it will be me in these shoes. I've already started the crying and senior year just started.

Rapunzel said...

Karla, I was not prepared for just how hard it is...sigh...

jan said...

I can't say anything to make you feel better about your empty nest... but I can say that I made your mom's brownie cookies yesterday and they were delightfully decadant and delicious. Thank you and lots of cookie-love in your mom's memory!

Aisling said...

Sending you hugs! I can understand your emotions. I just spent 5 days last week in Portland, OR with my girls. The oldest is planning to relocate there to go to Portland State U. She'd like to go this fall, and is accepted, but it may take a little more time to get all the details in line. Either way, she will soon fly away to the other side of the country. I'm thrilled for her; what an adventure in an amazing city. But... sad for me.