Wednesday, May 20, 2009
I'm having a tough time this morning and feel the need to vent/share, hope you'll bear with me here. As I've mentioned a time or two before, Beren has two teenage daughters who visit us every other weekend, a week here and there over holidays, etc. Let me first say that they are bright, lovely girls who have never caused us a bit of real trouble. They get good grades, are polite and have decent manners. However...this "blending" of our families has not been easy. As hormones swell and the realities of this "new" life have begun to sink in (they've been coming here for 2-1/2 years now), things have become more and more uncomfortable to the point where I am sometimes (Ok, often) dreading the weekends. Days before their arrival I start to fret, anxious and consumed with worry over what their visit will bring this time. Compound that with the fact that next month they will be coming to stay for an extended period of time - 2 solid weeks - something that has never happened before! I can only imagine how stressful that's going to be and yet have no idea how to make the situation better.
You see, I have read the parenting books, visited the appropriate websites, spoken with professionals, talked to the girls themselves until I am blue in the face and spent countless hours with Beren examining and reexamining every possible option, anything, anything to make their time with us more pleasant and comfortable for all, to no avail. Each and every time it's the same, with different degrees of tension, yet never ever without incident. I'm at my wits end, don't know what to do or where to turn from here, am becoming increasingly resentful and angry which is certainly not a good thing for any relationship. This is so unlike me, you all know that I am normally a kind, giving person, warm & welcoming to anyone visiting the Castle..and yet..here I am, ashamed of myself but unable to deny my feelings!
If any of you have been in my stilettos, can give me insight or some magic solution to the problem, please feel free to chime in. All I want is some peace and harmony in my home, live together and love each other without this chronic stress and strain! At this point I'm starting to believe that Cinderella's stepmother didn't start out evil; she was probably a lovely woman who was pushed to the limits by her ungrateful, unappreciative stepdaughter to the point where the poor dear finally just snapped! Just kidding....sort've....sigh...